Felled Tree as My Seat; Poems from ‘22-’23

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Big sloppy mutt

My screaming apologies matter not to you

Pain stands on your shoulders and laughs in your ears

and you asked me

you asked me through my window

Is this all?

then

when I didn’t answer

you knew

and in my rearview

back you curled

at the foot of the hill

welcoming the end

for it was the only thing that ever gave you warmth

Great Black Wasp

There’s a great black wasp lying dead on my headboard

I am too lazy to throw him out

poor bastard

he ran for his life

I killed him with Neruda

now we sleep together

the difference being I have to wake up tomorrow

Purple Bandana

I ran into all of you

At an event of sorts

Noses turned and opinions preconcieved

I wore my best suit

a purple bandana wrapped around my head

keeping my hair from my eyes

Hello

I barely reconize you in your dress

Flower behind your ear

A clean man by your side

Both ten feet tall

They look down onto me

I struggle to rise to look them in their eyes

my legs refuse

I shake his hand from the ground

perhaps where I belong

to dust my beard

and clean the stains from my teeth

Im glad you’re happy

in the walls given to you

that those before you have built

A pill of ignorance

once daily

dulls the mind

and brings a selfish peace

I choose to remain unmedicated

A Fire Wild

A fire wild burns through my chest and into my eyes

The reflection flickers

in your pupils the moons of mars

with raised brows and slow breaths

the windows to your soul whisper to me

shelter me

from what is frozen and without light

speak to me

all that you desire

and I will give to you all of which I have

Deliverance on A Summer Evening

The sun doesn’t set quite like it used to

I remember standing there

on my front porch in early June

watching the brilliant pink dance

hand and hand with the orange

I knew I had to be up early for a life that I didn’t want

but there I stayed

to watch the ending of the beauty that I knew

would never be replicated

Damn it all

where is that moment now

I’d love to inhale that existance once more

and to remember what it feels like

to hear my mother calling my name

30 December 2022

Imagine you’re given a boat

A really nice boat 

and then you’re given really nice rods and reels

of all sizes, shapes, and colors

And the man who gives you these is a successful fisherman

And he tells you where to go and how he does it 

So you’re given a large body of water

full of fish of all sizes, shapes, and colors 

And you’re given the job of catching them 

after you’ve been given the equipment 

and the knowledge 

to be a successful fisherman 

Yet you decide you’d rather be a failed artist than a successful fisherman

because at least the former is more daring 

And you can’t stop looking at the cliffs 

Lucky Kharms

You poor bastard

why is it you starve to death in a Russian prison for writing bullshit

and I sit here reading it on Christmas Day

stuffing my face with honey mustard and fried chicken

You poor bastard

you were just as I am

yet you beat it

you may never have known in this life but you’ve beaten it

you poor bastard

looks like you didn’t starve in that Russian prison after all

Unrequited

How pleasant they are, the mornings of spring 

The snowmelt runs quickly to fill the creeks

It is no wonder the song bird sings 

As flowers fill the windows of boutiques 

As well as the long days of mid-summer 

Where fireflies dance between wood and moon

When wine is best enjoyed with a lover 

And over valleys the Autumn air looms 

Blazing fields of bright orange and yellow 

Wood smoke rising over the tops of trees

A warm smile and a familiar hello 

Are things that often I wish I could see 

When the winter winds come I wish you knew 

When the winter winds come I think of you

Felled Tree as My Seat

How many countless times 

Have men and women alike 

Written poems about the falling leaves 

It almost makes me yawn 

Yet I see the appeal 

My leaves sail like ships

Across the creek bend 

Stems as rudders 

Carving unknown paths 

At the mercy of the wind 

How I wish, where I sit, 

Is larger than it is 

How I wish, where I sit, 

Time did not exist 

A Happy Day

A happy day 

My sister just gave birth to her third child

A healthy baby girl

I got a new job that doubled my income

We are going to Queenies tonight to celebrate

I kiss my love and bring her breakfast

then I head outside of our beautiful home

I sigh and sip my coffee

As I read the news from my phone 

On the back porch

Next to my pool

For which the man comes

I smile and greet him warmly

He tells me he often thinks of suicide