The Beginning
I’ve never known what I wanted to do with my life. Nor did I use to think about life outside of my hometown. My future was always a problem of tomorrow, and the idea of it scared me.
In January of 2018, a friend of mine showed me the first chords to Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here. Later that same night, I dug around a hall closet at my house and pulled out an old nylon string acoustic guitar that previously belonged to my great grandmother. It was clunky and cheaply made, a forgotten instrument. Despite all of that, it played, and that’s all I wanted. I began teaching myself that night, nothing motivating me other than the enjoyment it brought me. I did not care if I could play exactly what I would hear on the record, more so that I could capture the essence of the song. The groove, the feeling that it gave me when I listened to it. That is what I wanted to be able to reciprocate when I began playing. I would play every single day, only appearing in the kitchen just long enough to show my mom the most recent progress I had made.
After a few months, my mom and grandma offered to help pay for my first few lessons. Though, I was hesitant. Attempting to learn an instrument is challenging, and playing in front of others terrified me. After reaching what I felt like was a plateau in my progress, and despite my fear, I signed up for my first lesson. I was eighteen years old.
The next five years would turn out to be some of the most challenging in my life. I’ve lost people I've loved, struggled with who I was as a person, and grappled with the idea of what this life all really meant. The pandemic was tough, but it allowed me to slow down and focus on my playing. I began playing live shows as soon as everything opened back up, but I never thought in my lifetime I would be on a stage in front of people. Just the idea of it made me nauseous. I’ve always been on the quiet side, never being a big fan of the spotlight. I find my only weapon against my anxiety and self doubt is my love for music. It is how I find the strength to get past my personal struggles.
I would have never guessed the amount of friendships and good times that the guitar has brought me. I’ve met and worked with many amazing people, most of them now I consider my closest friends. Now set to graduate college this month, I am faced with the same dilemma I had faced five years ago. This time, however, I am armed with the knowledge of who I am and what I love.
I love to play music. I love to write. I love to create works of art. I love nature. I love mountain biking. I love coffee. I love seasoned firewood. I love video games. I love cooking. This is where the idea for this website came from. I wanted a place to share my musical endeavors, my writing, archive my art works, and to be myself. I look out onto the rest of my life with no certainty of what comes next. The only thing I do know, is that I am going to spend my life doing what I love. It all begins here.
- Charlie
